We're back! We're talking about the TV show Community, a show that was always in danger of being canceled until it got canceled. What a life.
Here in this pilot episode, we meet our intrepid cast of characters. Almost entirely treasures! So far we've got a lawyer and the hot blonde and like five other main characters and several other less important characters! Look, if we listed them all, we'd be here forever. Just listen to the dang thing!
Ben is a mailman who makes things up all the time. Mike drops out of high school to impress musicians.
Do you remember all the way back to last week when a study group was formed for a Spanish class? ENTER THE SPANISH CLASS. We meet two very important characters in the form of Spanish Genius Señor Chang and Starburns. The gang is tasked to make 5 Spanish sentences and some of them also decide to protest the silencing of journalists in Guatemala.
Meanwhile, we create our own Spanish sentences about Finding Nemo. We talk about student loans (insert sad frown emoji), scotch, and swapping T-shirts.
Ben negotiates for his shirt. Mike thinks about Anakin Skywalker.
Jeff finds the ultimate blow off class and Abed takes a film class. Britta ends up taking a class of her own, which is a class on why you maybe shouldn't be the mother character to your friends. Jeff's blow off class turns into a class about seizing the day. It's all a lot of class.
Speaking of class, we find out about about Mike's classes in college and it's a wild ride. Also we find out about Ben's own masterpiece films.
Ben makes a political attack ad. Mike gets a B in a class about hanging out.
Annie gets Troy and Abed to take part in a psychological experiment. Britta gets some guy with tiny nipples to make out with her like some sort of weird baby bird / mama bird situation. Jeff and Shirley become fast friends thanks to the power of gossip. And Pierce? Well, don't worry too much about him. He's in the background being 0.69% Inspector Gadget.
As for your hosts? They have become the stuff of legends. Constellations that whose stories will be told through the ages. We also Google... uh... butt stuff. And we obviously talk more about tiny nipples. They're kind of central to the episode.
Ben is vaguely aware of what "Hotline Bling" is. Mike describes the tightest of beverages.
What would your school's statue be? What if it was a statue of your school's most famous alumnus? At Greendale, their statue is of none other than Luis Guzman. Abed is maybe an alien. Britta cheats or maybe not cheats but definitely cheats. Leonard isn't wearing any swim trunks. Shirley briefly exists.
Ben goes on a Colorado rant. Mike eats some paper with delicious cherry sauce.
The Dean wants to use Jeff to get Troy to play football, to Annie's dismay. Pierce makes a mascot. Britta learns a thing or to about peeing. Abed lays low. We all learn about racism or feminism or... y'know I'm not sure anymore.
Meanwhile, we're generating Seinfeld scripts with artificial intelligence and figuring out who Mike's other Community character is. This episode brought to you by Gringlegrob's School for Disembodied Heads.
Ben is just trackin' trees and bears. Mike is Steve... dumbass.
Jeff finally gives up on trying to get with Britta so instead he decides to try to get with his statistics professor instead. There's also a confusing extra credit Halloween party for Dia de los Muertos (which is not Mexican Halloween). The Beastmaster shows up.
Talking points for this episode includes sexiest classes, beef with Urban Dictionary dot com, Netflix and chill, Huey Lewis and the News. It is, as always, all over the place.
Ben gets in a fight with a website. Mike gets some gazpacho for his date.
This one went a little bit long because we are both social distancing and we got a little bit loopy about it.
But enough about us! Annie tries to help Troy out on a date with another woman (and she's definitely a woman) as some way to try to get closer to Troy. Spoiler: it doesn't work great. Jeff gets kicked out of his condo and lives with Abed and spoiler: it doesn't work great. Britta and Shirley are the true heroes in this one. Pierce joins a band, too. That happens.
Ben is a mediocre avocado. Mike buys too many Honey Buns.
Jeff gets suckered into joining the debate team. Britta tries to quit smoking. Abed makes eerily accurate films. That's the episode! Honestly this is going up late so I don't know what else to even say about it at this point. Hopefully you watched it, so you know what happened.
Ben gets really interested in Panfira. Mike gets really interested in marble racing.
We're sorry for doing an outtakes episode so early into the podcast, but 2020, am I right?
What I won't apologize for is comedy.
We hope you're all staying safe. See you next week!
Ben is full of righteous idgidignbignnation. Mike gets kicked into a sarlacc pit yet again.